W.F. Stubbs
  • Home
  • About
  • Buy
  • Poetry
  • Blog
  • Music
    • Selections & Links
    • Opus List
    • Proposed Albums
    • Songs Without Music >
      • 1993
      • The Hunter's Knife (Lyric)
    • Music Reviews

Time to write, time to cook, time to exercise, time to live.

28/8/2021

6 Comments

 
Picture
New Zealand went into their second Level 4 lock-down last Wednesday 18th August on only my second day at my new job as assistant gardener at a retirement village. 'What an opportunity' I thought to myself. Here I was in an isolated cabin halfway down the property tenant's jungle of a backyard garden, a writing desk, a kitchenette (double hotplate, fridge, basin, jug), and time on my hands to continue writing Dim Day.

One of the tenants visits the beach every morning here in Paekākāriki which was great non-verbal encouragement for me to do the same - most mornings I have. Once lock-down arrived I chose to be a lot more discreet about it, running approx. 3km up the coastal trail, checking out how deserted the beach is before finding an unoccupied spot to wade in and feel the rush of winter salt water washing over me before jogging back to keep up my warmth. Occasionally the debris lapping in on the morning waves has left me less clean than when I went in, so on my arrival back I pop around the corner of the cabin out of sight and have a hose-down. A minimum of 21 press-ups, 21 "leg-ups" (lying on my back and lifting the legs up and down) accompany the morning rising from my bed, or the return from the sea, occasionally I do straight-leg sit-ups with my back as straight as possible. The abs aren't quite showing yet, but that's probably the fault of that packet of Toffee Pops and Whitaker's Artisan Chocolate I bought last week (...and the yoghurts, and the salamis, and the cheeses I bought many times before that as well!). But still, as I said to our new flatmate ("resimate" as I refer to the house dwellers on the property (i.e: Residential Mates)) when she expressed the fact that at her current mid-50s age this is the healthiest, both mentally and physically, that she has ever been, I concurred and was able to relate - in my 44 years this is also the healthiest, mentally and physically, that I have ever been. There is a photo of me from 2010 with quite a puffy face - years of Burger King, Burgerfuel, and heavy protein and carb dinners that weren't being worked off. Since moving into my car and living on the side of the river from 2018, all that unnecessary fat has been shed; with a much more consistent approach to physical body toning without any obsessive desire to build muscle, a massive reduction in food focusing on one good meal each day and only snacking (at most) (mostly nuts) beforehand (and coffee with honey replacing sugar) adding up to an average of 1.5 meals a day, I have consistently weighed-in at less than 67kgs for the past four years. There is no guilt should I choose to eat some Toffee Pops, some licorice (unless I eat them all at once, which I have done *shakes head sadly*), because I know that their energy source will get used rather than be stored (I mean, mostly - like I said, my abs still aren't showing *grumpy face*).

Anyway, enough about me. Dinners are coming along just fine. As you can see, tonight I made a crushed Pumpkin and Sunflower Seed curry with mixed beans on pulse pasta instead of rice. A very tasty meal for this lone red cabin dweller. But this is not a lone lock-down bubble (though I would have no problem if it was). Every day of the week, the five of us take turns cooking for one another in the house (back of photo, extra sleep-out to left), and have ranging conversations from gardening (everyone's a gardener, except me - total newbie!), to books, to music, to covid, to "can we trust the authorities???" - it's all up for discussion, and makes the evening over a glass of wine that much more enjoyable.

But what about Dim Day? Yes, what about the novel I've been trying to write since 2009? I have reached 48,000 words with only 5-6 scenes left to either write or finish off, which I expect the total word-count to be around 60,000. This is a good amount, as there has been a bit extra world-building going on, which I am cautious about. Why? Is not solid world-building the goal? Yes, but this book was never meant to describe a 'world' as such; it was only ever meant to describe a place. Imagine walking into a theatre to watch a play, seeing the curtains rise you know that the props in the background are not real, but you suspend your disbelief and invest in what the actors portray. This was always my intention, and I have tried to keep that world-building to a minimum so that the reader doesn't get distracted, so that the reader only knows what supports the story directly related to the characters. This is not science fiction, this is not mainstream 'genre' fantasy, I wouldn't even call it magic realism; there is no magic, there are no monsters and strange creatures, no technology advancing and changing society other than what characters may project with limited knowledge; what there is instead are animal and plant variations that inhabit their own ecological niche, there are people who act and feel like us living in a similar past, but there is only this place, similar, but very different, and the story that unfolds from one dim day to the next...

Picture
6 Comments

Viriconium & the Lesson Learned

23/4/2021

0 Comments

 
Viriconium is a tough read – you might want to immerse yourself slowly in the language M. John Harrison uses to describe his vision of Earth in a far-distant future, otherwise you may find yourself drowning: Big words and long descriptive passages are his stock in trade…

  • “In the water-thickets, the path wound tortuously between umber iron-bogs, albescent quicksands of aluminum and magnesium oxides, and sumps of cuprous blue or permanganate mauve fed by slow, gelid streams and fringed by silver reeds and tall black grasses.”

As a writer, I found the language fascinating; as a reader I found the passages hard-going and I began to question why I was still reading this book, considering that I had struggled through only a quarter of it. Wouldn’t I get more satisfaction from riding my skateboard out in the sun? Perhaps even working on that song that I wrote the other night that doesn’t have any lyrics yet!
       There had to be a reason I was wading through these verbose descriptions that culminated in dizziness and a weight-riddled head, as though my brain was trying to bust out of the skull in an attempt to escape. There had to be.

Flipping the book over, I read the quotes on the back cover: “Harrison is a blazing original …” (Clive Baker). I nodded my head – he was definitely different. “One of the best modern writers of fantasy. No, one of the best modern writers period” (Katharine Kerr). Harrison wasn’t convincing me of his brilliance. “No-one can use words like M. John Harrison. They trust him” (Michael Marshall Smith).
       Maybe my problem is that I don’t trust words, maybe that’s why this book is such a hard slog through tortuous word-thickets and
albescent quicksands of paragraphs.
       And yet I pick the book up again and push on.

It’s true, y’ know – I don’t trust words. Words cower when I demand their use, they go into hiding, they look for better writers than me to express their inner beauties.

I stumble.

Far too often,

Over my own inadequacies.

So I rest for a while, have a break from reading. Midnight is closing in and I have words, many of them – mostly Harrison’s – swirling around my head like a thesaurus. But what to do with them? I pick up pen and paper and suddenly words come pouring out in short verse-like sentences that don’t make any apparent sense, but I don’t care because I am writing, and words spill forth with more enthusiasm than ever before, demanding that I write them down instead of going into hiding.        Where once inspiration would peter out under the weight of criticism, here instead, I let go of all preconceptions and get more done.

I titled the piece ‘The Candle End of Time,’ but when I had the (brilliant) idea to attach it to the heavy metal song without lyrics that I had written the previous day, it became ‘The Sign of the Locust’ – both are references to Viriconium, the book that taught me to trust words.

It is ironic that in preparing for this essay I read an article where Harrison states: “This is one of Viriconium’s many jigsawed messages to the reader. You can’t hope to control things. Learn to love the vertigo of experience instead.”

Reading Viriconium was nothing short of experiencing vertigo!



  • 13/03/08, Palmerston North

The Sign of the Locust


Show us a gun that will shine in our temples
And no one will ever look back for seconds,
Nothing is gained, though nothing is lost
What can be said when nothing is left?
A bleeding sister on a pavement scarred
With the absence of life’s rewards,
Shut out the façade that blinds our minds
And leaves us stalking the candle end of time.


One more step down to the cellar below
Shut off the night where darkness grows,
The form wings that give you breath
Have yet to seize their foolish flight.


Follow the path to the next abscess
Where all minds are purged and left craving breakfast,
A feast on a table of cards
Shows no more than that which was discarded.


White ants are marching (forward)
From the hole to the hill,
Clutch your food and learn
The appropriation rules.


White ants are looking
For a home away from hell,
But purpose is a disease
That infests and then spreads out.


- 2002, Auckland

0 Comments
Forward>>

    RSS Feed

    Archives

    June 2026
    May 2026
    March 2026
    February 2026
    January 2026
    December 2025
    November 2025
    September 2025
    August 2025
    July 2025
    May 2025
    April 2025
    January 2025
    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    April 2024
    November 2023
    July 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    July 2022
    April 2022
    November 2021
    August 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    October 2020
    December 2019
    June 2019
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    January 2017
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    May 2015
    March 2015
    July 2013

    Categories

    All
    A Scene
    Assault
    Bandcamp
    Beethoven
    Books
    City
    Classical
    Composition
    Crime
    Critique
    Culture
    Depression
    Dim Day
    Egoism
    Environment
    Family
    Fiction
    Film
    Folk
    Guitar
    Health
    Home
    Housing
    Iinterview
    Journal
    Justice
    Life
    Literature
    Mental Health
    Miscarriage Of Justice
    Movies
    Mozart
    MuseScore
    Music
    Music Reviews
    Musings
    Novel
    Orchestral
    Peace
    Personal
    Pet
    Poem
    Poetry
    Publishing
    Rock
    Rugby
    Science Fiction
    Social
    Society
    Sonata Form
    Songs
    Sound
    Star Trek
    The Falling City
    The Tasman Journey
    Victims
    Work
    Writing
    YouTube

Proudly powered by Weebly
  • Home
  • About
  • Buy
  • Poetry
  • Blog
  • Music
    • Selections & Links
    • Opus List
    • Proposed Albums
    • Songs Without Music >
      • 1993
      • The Hunter's Knife (Lyric)
    • Music Reviews